my mellow and sweet soon-to-become romance seems to have almost died, and i can't understand what was the reason for him to lose the interest so suddenly. was it my openness that drove him away? can't be, just can't be. i mean… i know for sure i didn't do anything that was unnatural for me, so if he became indifferent because of my actions, then, well, good! didn't know i would be so upset though, sitting like a puppy near the phone (being too proud to write a message myself, of course).
anyhow, regardless of what's happened, i am torn between two desires: to have and to throw away and forget. i am getting sentimental and i didn't want that at all. and i am scared, so scared.
....jesus fucking christ, elena. nothing has even happened between you two except for a couple of cute messages, a bit of sincerity and sparkles of electricity on the tips of the fingers when touching each other. and you are here in a puddle of sadness. he hasn't written for one fucking day, just one baby. your imagination gets in the way again. chill and do your stuff. again. whatever happens, happens. and whatever happens, needs to happen.